BETWEEN SEXUAL LIBERATION AND TABOO
Sexuality and desire, intimacy and preferences – these seem to have become part of everyday normality in our society. After all, we are more open and tolerant now than we were ten, fifteen, or twenty years ago. Aren’t we?
The famous phrase “sex sells” remains a guiding principle for pop culture and marketing campaigns. There are major trade fairs like Venus, where everything revolves around permissiveness and erotica. And last but not least, a large proportion of the German population consumes pornographic content regularly.
However, there is a ‘but’ hidden here: in most cases, the target group consists predominantly of heterosexual cis men. Consequently, sexualised advertising and erotic-to-pornographic content are mostly geared towards the so-called “male gaze“. This is reflected in the figures regarding who regularly consumes content on porn platforms: according to a study from last year, approximately 80 per cent of male respondents stated they watch porn regularly, whereas for women, the figure was one-third.
This gives rise to a further problem: the lack of ‘safer spaces’ for exploring one’s own sexuality for women, non-binary individuals, and queer people.
SEX TECH FOR MORE SEX POSITIVITY
Interestingly, efforts have been made since at least the 1970s to counter this sense of shame and ensure greater equality under the banner of “Sex Positivity“. Yet even today, sexuality is often tabooed, particularly regarding marginalised groups. An example that arises from this, and which clearly illustrates the situation, is the gender gap in orgasms. The fact is: on average, men reach orgasm significantly more frequently than women.
However, amidst all this, there is also something positive to report: the efforts to stand up for greater equality and sex positivity are by no means exhausted or diminishing. There are now tech start-ups that have made this their very mission. The sector: Sex Tech. And one start-up from this field that we would like to introduce in more detail in this blog post is xounds from Berlin.
XOUNDS – A DIGITAL SAFER SPACE FOR INTIMACY AND SEXUALITY
“xounds is an app that creates a digital safer space for exploring, sharing, and learning, acting like a SoundCloud for user-generated audio revolving around the themes of intimacy and sexuality,” explains Co-Founder and CEO Cornelia Steinbock regarding the principle behind xounds. It is, therefore, a platform where users can listen to audio content anonymously and securely, as well as upload it themselves.
The content created by users can cover various formats, such as sounds, audio dramas, stories, tutorials, or podcasts. “All modes of use are intended to liberate and encourage people to engage with the diversity of intimacy – both in fantasy and in real-life practice – and to do so in a respectful manner,” says Cornelia.
Unlike many other platforms where erotic content is distributed, xounds, as a digital safer space, is not aimed exclusively at a male audience. The app is primarily for people “who have rarely felt represented until now”. This includes, above all, FLINTA* individuals (women, lesbians, intersex, non-binary, trans, and agender people), older people, or couples interested in genuine intimacy. According to Cornelia, the aim is to offer these people a secure digital space and an opportunity “to make their voices heard”.
“ETHICAL AI AS A DIGITAL AWARENESS TEAM”
But if the content is contributed by the users themselves, how can safety be guaranteed and misuse avoided?
First of all, it is important to note that only persons registered on the platform can share content with others. During the upload process itself, an “ethical AI acting as a digital awareness team” is utilised, amongst other measures. If someone wishes to upload a file, a so-called “xoundcheck” takes place every time, according to Cornelia. This proceeds as follows: “First, a live spoken consent statement is verified by cross-referencing the recorded voice with the voice in the uploaded audio. Finally, the content of the audio is checked for freedom from discrimination,” Cornelia explains.
And should there be any uncertainty, the final review is carried out by the team itself. This is to ensure that all published content complies with xounds’ guidelines. Furthermore, for all eventualities, there is the option for users to report corresponding audios retrospectively should they violate the guidelines.
AN ABSOLUTE LISTENING PLEASURE
Alongside Cornelia Steinbock, Co-Founder Gabor Farkasch acts as CPO and CMO, forming the second head of the founding team behind xounds. While Cornelia originally studied Political Science and Economics and subsequently completed several stints – for example in the Bundestag, at the Irish Embassy in Berlin, at human rights organisations, and most recently at the non-profit association Acker e.V. – Gabor is a designer, creative director, and branding coach with extensive experience in digital product development and brand strategy, bringing his expertise to xounds in the areas of UX design, interface design, and visual communication.
They met in 2019. Their friendship solidified during the lockdown in the Covid pandemic. “Suddenly, everything was no longer easily accessible: clubs, workshops, and other places of encounter were missing,” reports Cornelia. A mutual promise followed to try out more things as soon as places of encounter became accessible again. And one of these places was the sex-positive scene in Berlin. They took part in workshops on consent as well as stigma-free parties, which, according to Cornelia, was a very valuable experience: “We were thrilled by how much one can learn about one’s own body, well-being, relationships, and thus also sexuality in such so-called ‘safer spaces’.”
However, what also became clear to them was the realisation “that while physical places are incredibly important,” Cornelia adds that “access can be given to many people, above all, through digital meeting places”. Thus, a digital platform like xounds can be a door opener to explore sexuality and intimacy.
However, there were no such digital meeting places that met their expectations. And so Cornelia and Gabor considered together how “such a digital safer space should be designed for them, in order to be able to reflect the values of consent, anonymity, and mindfulness with a respectful exchange regarding genuine, diverse sexuality”. What was immediately certain was the fact that audio is the perfect medium for their idea. Cornelia explains it thus: “Audio enables anonymity and low-threshold access for people who want to share their voice, fantasies, questions, and more.” Their research ultimately confirmed that audio is a suitable medium for conveying knowledge and inspiration regarding intimacy and sexuality. The foundation stone for the founding of xounds was thus laid.
WHAT’S NEXT?
In April 2025, the start-up participated in the Investment Readiness Programme of the MediaTech Hub Accelerator and has been part of the portfolio ever since. Here, the team has been able to acquire valuable knowledge regarding investment cases and gain exciting insights during sessions with business angels and other founders. A further benefit is the existing ecosystem in Potsdam. Additionally, xounds receives funding through the EXIST Business Start-up Grant in cooperation with the University of Potsdam.
And what are the plans for the future? According to Cornelia, xounds intends to position itself internationally and expand the team slightly. Furthermore, the goal is to have up to 10,000 active users on the platform within the next 12 months. And to further improve the user experience, work on the app is continuing. In addition, there are to be further features. To finance these plans, the team is currently looking for suitable business angels.
You can also find out more about xounds in the xoundcast, the podcast by the two co-founders Cornelia and Gabor. The individual episodes are due to be uploaded to the usual streaming portals soon. However, all episodes of the xoundcastare already available to listen to in the xounds app now.
